Who said you could grow up?

  What is it about 5 years old that makes it such a milestone birthday? 
  Maybe because it means school and writing and homework; loose teeth and no training wheels and no more needing pushes on the swing. 
  Whatever the reason, my daughter is turning 5 and I've taken a turn for the sentimental. I've been looking at baby pictures and remembering only the good things about those times. (Diapers? Not so bad. Terrible twos? Not so terrible.) 

  I made her a photo book as a gift (she loves looking at pictures of herself!) and the cover is a photo of her as a baby next to a picture of her now. Really? That same squirmy infant, who couldn't hold up her head or roll over or sit up, has somehow transformed into a bounding, friendly little girl who can write letters and jump high and run fast. Who shows off her accomplishments with pride and is constantly calling out "Look at this" so I can see such wonderful feats as picking up marbles with her toes. 
  My challenge is to treat her as the growing little person that she is, no longer a baby or a toddler or a preschooler; now she's - a kid. To remember that takes some getting used to. I want to jump in and help and do things for her that not-so-long-ago she couldn't. "Let me zipper your jacket." "I'll get that for you." "Do you need some help with that?"

   Nope, Mama, she's a big kid now. She needs the freedom and space to be independent.
  She has some ambivalence about it, somehow sensing the significance of turning the big 5. "But I want to stay 4," she said a few times. "I want to be your baby." To which she was reassured that she would always be my baby, even when she was a teenager and it was embarrassing, even when she was in college, even when she had babies of her own.
  I'm eager to see what the future holds for her - how will she like school? Who will her little friends be? What will be her strengths and interests? 

  But a part of me will always hold dear when she was an infant, grasping my finger with her whole fist, holding her close while she happily sucked at her bottle, toddling around the house. They are memories now, my own, that no one can take and I'll always treasure. 
  Happy birthday, big kid.

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